Everybody's Going To The Moon

I want to start updating more regularly now. I think one update a day or every two days is quite reasonable, at least in the beginning. That should keep me on my path, too. But let's recap the past week: Well, it seems there wasn't much to that weird nightmare after all. At least nothing I noticed specifically. Still, a lot of things have happened. I've been working a lot on cleaning up the first room, in which I spend most of my free time. It's almost done and it feels great. I am proud of myself and I feel a lot more comfortable in it now. That's what I want for the other rooms, too, so let's get to it!

Last night I lay awoke for some time. After having a quick chat with Melinda I thought about the fact that I probably won't see her ever again. And even if I will, it's likely not to be in the next five or six years. I thought of how meeting her just as a friend after all that time would be like. Yeah, yeah, delusional fantasizing, I know. But this led me to something I have been ignoring for many years, if not all my life: Where do I see myself five years from now?

Sometimes, things like that are asked in job interviews and now I know why. Being the lazy slacker I was, I never really thought about it. I probably would've given a rather vague answer until now. You don't want to employ someone like that. But actually thinking about it, I imagined how I want my life to be five years from now. And boy, do I have a long road ahead of me.

But this gave me a sense of perspective. I thought a lot about it and started transforming those goals into paths that would lead me there. What started as a rather bad way of thinking turned into a new revelation for me, giving me strength and a determination I was starting to loose again. It gave me a new goal. A better goal.

I have a vision of my future life and I want it to become true. Not just “I don't want to be miserable anymore” – the way I started this blog – but “I want to achieve!”

Have you ever sat down and just thought about what exactly you want to achieve in the next five years? For a good two hours? I highly recommend it. It was my salvation.

Room Of Nowhere

On to the next point! Apartment! My apartment is a mess and looks like hell. Seriously. It's just another chaos that adds to my stress level and is in dire need of a restructuring. So here's the plan:

Clean up the place
Sort and organize stuff
Re-envision room design
Buy/sell/dump furniture
Paint
Re-design rooms

These steps will have to be done for six rooms all in all and since I'm playing with the thought of changing room structure & purpose (where is a working space, hobby space, living room, etc.) I will perform the steps one by one for all rooms at once. Of course I will still only clean up one room at a time, but first clean all rooms, then sort all rooms, then re-design.

Why re-design the whole thing and not just organize it? Easy. It doesn't have a real structure right now, one room is just a dumping area without any purpose and the arrangement of furniture confines me, narrowing free space down to a minimum. Free space always gives me a good feeling. A feeling of freedom and happiness. I have observed this effect when entering certain apartments of friends or relatives and I will follow their example.

Before it comes to redesigning, I will share a rough illustration of the blueprints. Maybe someone has some good ideas about it. Until then it's clean up time and I'm starting with it right now.